Way of Life: When No One Is Watching

By Pallavi Sahu, Psychologist

Wait for a second to pause to think about this unornamented yet profound question, who are you when no one is watching? I figure out that the complete essence of a person, who he/she is, lies in this question. Do we really do what we preach? For instance, many famous personalities are called on to advertise their product because fans would like to see them. As a result, the customer might do/buy what is being preached/shown. How many of these leading influential souls-who have the power to change the lives of many, use the product they advertise? I doubt if any! But exceptions might be there whom I genuinely appreciate. Have they ever thought that they are preaching something they might not practice? Why do influential people sell a product they might not believe in. Only for monetary gains? Choose your ads wisely as millions of us look upon you because we trust and believe in you. For decades, Fair and Lovely ran their ads with the brand name -which shouted discrimination as well as it was misleading. But better late than never, they realized what damage they were doing by promoting fairness as the only criteria. Now it is renamed- Glow & Lovely. Better!

Integrity

Why Am I Raising This Concern? Because I feel as if we have forgotten about the practice of integrity in our lives. We fail to acknowledge and inculcate the most vital trait for a human being to possess-Integrity. 

Integrity, in ethics, is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of our actions. The practice of integrity is doing the right thing in all circumstances by sticking to our values, beliefs, and morals, even when no one is watching. When we live with integrity, people connect with us through the heart, not the mind. It might sound lame for some in our world. Practicing integrity can never be foolish- people who practice integrity in their lives are admired- for who they are as a person because of their honesty and sincerity. We all are fond of such people who are genuine to themselves and to others. We know we can trust such a person under any circumstances. Integrity is a sign of trust, honesty, respect, and love. Even trait we acquire goes in vain if we lack integrity because we can be genuinely true to others only when we are true to ourselves. Warren Buffet once said, In looking for people to hire, look for three qualities: Integrity, Intelligence, and Energy. And if they don’t have the first, the other two will kill you.

A life lived with integrity-even if it lacks trappings of fame and fortune is a shining star in whose light others may follow in the years to come- Denis Waitley

Mr. R and Mr. T

There were two old aged people (Mr. R and Mr. T). Mr. R is a very wealthy man-no shortage of money. Yet, he is dishonest, manipulative and he tries to use people to accumulate more wealth. On the other hand, Mr. T is poor-somehow he manages his life- even so, he is a gentleman who firmly sticks to his values and beliefs under every circumstance. He is well mannered and always helps those in need even if he has less. If given a choice-which man would you like to visit – Mr.R or Mr.T? I am sure most of us would like to meet Mr.T because of his behavior, because of his way of life, because of how he makes us feel-wealth is seen as secondary by us too. Unfortunately, nowadays, children are learning the hard way to grasp the real essence of being good, the value of good behavior. Yes, it might not add to our wealth all the time. Nevertheless, it gives immense mental peace, satisfaction, people who stick to you for their whole life as each of us one likes trustworthy people moreover, nowadays, such people are really less.

Practicing Integrity

To live with integrity, we must be truthful and honest with ourselves first. Few take away especially, for students to take a step towards the practice of integrity: 

• Value your words and commitment-Practice sticking to your commitments. It is beneficial for students to practice integrity by committing to what schedule they have put for themselves to study,

• Focus on your class when the teacher is teaching and be true to yourself by practicing what you say,

• Take notes and listen very carefully as class lectures are very effective to learn better,

•  Try not to get involved in playing games or watching videos when the teacher explains. You are lying to yourself by doing something else when no one is watching by playing games or doing something else. Be such that there is no need for anyone to monitor you, be such that there is no need for anyone to ask you what you did,

• Cheating/Copying-Everybody feels like cheating at some point in school days, yet we stay away from it because we value our values. We are aware that copying is not going to help us learn. Such things are convenient to put to practice through online mode nowadays. Look at it as a chance to test our integrity as a child. Can you stay away from copying and mobile games even if you have not studied? Cheating never helps!

• Treat fellow human beings with respect– people will always remember how you make them feel so practice making everyone feel respected in your presence,

• Value time-time wasted will not come back so, utilize your time intelligently and,

• Learn to take responsibility for your actions-If you have scored less – take responsibility- that you have not studied the way you were supposed to rather than saying that paper was not good. You want to be victorious in your life-then never hesitate to take responsibility for your actions-that is a step towards Integrity,
• Build Trust– Make such a reputation with your actions that your parents can trust you under every circumstance- it is in your hands to make them believe in you.

If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything-Mark Twain

If you want to be successful, you must respect one rule: NEVER LIE TO YOURSELF- Paulo Coelho

Practice Integrity and make it a way of life to reap its sweet results in the future.

Thank you so much for your time and patience. Thanks for reading. 
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You can also find me at pausementalwellnessstudio(facebook page),linkedin,twitter and quora

Best Wishes-
Pallavi Sahu,Psychologist,pausementalwellnessstudio.com 

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